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How to find a muslim husband

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Some call it haram -- or forbidden -- but more Muslims than ever are turning to apps like Minder and Muzmatch to find romance. When my friend first told me she was looking for a partner on Minder, I thought it was a typo. She didn't. Minder is a real thing, an app Muslims use to browse local singles, much like Tinder. As a Muslim, you get used to people not understanding your life. They don't get why you cover your hair or why you don't eat during Ramadan, the holy month of fasting.

And they definitely don't get how Muslim relationships work. I've been asked countless times if we get hitched solely through arranged marriages. We don't. Some people seem to have a notion Islam is stuck in the 15th century. Yes, there's always that family friend who can't stop herself from playing matchmaker. But many Muslim millennials, especially those of us who grew up in the West, want more control over who we end up spending the rest of our lives with. Platforms like Minder and Muzmatch , another Muslim dating app, have put that power in our hands.

They counteract misconceptions that Islam and modernity don't mix. And ultimately, they're proof that we, like 15 percent of Americans , use technology to find love. That stigma, prevalent in many immigrant communities, also applies to meeting people online, which is generally viewed by some as desperate.

But as more people sign up for these apps, that notion is being challenged, says Muzmatch CEO and founder Shahzad Younas. Even the word "dating" is contentious among Muslims. Especially for those from my parents' generation, it carries a negative connotation and pits Islamic ideals about intimacy against Western cultural norms. But for others, it's merely a term for getting to know someone and finding out if you're a match. As with all faiths, people follow more liberal or conservative rules around dating depending on how they interpret religious doctrines and what they choose to practice.

There are, of course, similarities between Muslim and mainstream dating apps like Tinder , OkCupid and Match. All have their fair share of quirky bios, pictures of guys in muscle shirts and awkward conversations about what we do for a living.

But a few features -- including one that lets "chaperones" peek at your messages -- make Muslim-catered apps stand out. In February, I finally decided to check out Minder for myself. As someone in my mid-twenties, I'm essentially a prime target for dating apps , yet this was my first time trying one. I'd always been hesitant to put myself out there and didn't have much faith I'd meet anyone worthwhile.

Minder, which launched in , has had over , sign-ups, the company says. Haroon Mokhtarzada, the CEO, says he was inspired to create the app after meeting several "well educated, highly eligible" Muslim women who struggled to find the right guy to marry. He felt technology could help by connecting people who might be geographically scattered.

When creating my profile, I was asked to indicate my level of religiosity on a sliding scale, from "Not practicing" to "Very religious. I indicated my family origin my parents immigrated to the US from Iraq in ; languages spoken English, Arabic ; and education level, then filled in the "About me" section.

You can even choose to indicate how soon you want to get married, but I opted to leave that blank. Who even knows? These details can, for better or worse, become the focus of potential relationships. A Sunni may only want to be with another Sunni. Someone who's less religious may not be able to relate to someone with more strict interpretations of the faith. One person on the app might be looking for something more casual, while another might be seeking a serious relationship that leads to marriage.

I started to swipe. A lot. There were some decent candidates, but it didn't take long to realize why my friends had such little success on these kinds of apps. Guys had a tendency to post selfies with weird Snapchat puppy filters and pictures of their cars, and there was an odd abundance of photos with tigers.

Several "About me" sections just said "Ask me. I did get a kick out of some of the lines in the bios, like: "Trying to avoid an arranged marriage to my cousin," "Misspelled Tinder on the app store and, well, here we are," and, "My mother manages this profile. My personal favorite: "I have Amazon Prime. My friend Diana Demchenko, who is also Muslim, downloaded the app with me as we sat on my couch one Saturday evening, and she managed to stay on it a grand total of 30 hours before deleting it.

She was overwhelmed by how many people you can swipe through without even noticing. Some people have found success, of course. Three years ago, after a tough breakup, year-old Saba Azizi-Ghannad of New York started to feel hopeless.

She was busy with medical school and not meeting a lot of people. Then a friend told her about Minder. Suddenly, she was connecting with people across the country.

She eventually matched with Hadi Shirmohamadali, 31, from California. The pair pictured at the top of this story talked on FaceTime every day. Around six weeks later, they met in person for dinner in New York City. After about four months of occasional meetings, their parents met.

Muzmatch is another popular app among Muslims. Founded in , it reached a million members this year. Muzmatch asks you to share information like when you want to get married, whether you drink or smoke, and how often you pray. A few features set the app apart from Minder. For one, you can see if a person has swiped right on you, which is slightly horrifying but also somewhat helpful. Apps like Hinge also include this feature, while others including Minder will tell you who's liked you if you pay for a premium subscription.

I did feel like I was more likely to swipe right on someone who showed interest in me if I'd been on the fence about them before. Muzmatch CEO Shahzad Younas says he opted to include that level of transparency because the app is designed for people who are more serious about finding a partner. That's great until you start seeing people on the app you know in real life, which happens often in a place like the San Francisco Bay Area, where social circles often overlap.

That, my friends, is when I decided to tap out. No need to stir up drama or make things uncomfortable. The app also lets "chaperones" monitor your messages. People who aren't comfortable having one-on-one conversations with random people online can invite a family member or friend to follow their chats and make sure all's good.

Everyone in the conversation is aware another person can read the messages. As strange as it may sound to willingly have a third person read your texts, it could help ease someone onto the platform if they follow more conservative guidelines about who they can talk to. Civil rights attorney Zahra Billoo says features catered to Muslims, such as one that asks how often you pray, help her narrow down candidates on dating apps like Minder and Muzmatch.

Pick and choose what's important to you. Muzmatch also asks how often you pray. There are five required daily prayers in Islam, and some people may feel more comfortable being with someone who adheres to that requirement.

Civil rights attorney Zahra Billoo appreciates the prayer gauge feature. As someone who prays daily, it helps her narrow her options to someone who's more aligned to her lifestyle.

That, of course, is a serious concern across all dating apps. Just because you have more options doesn't mean they're all going to be a fit for you, she cautions. Muzmatch has also had its fair share of success stories: More than 25, people around the world have found their partner through the app, Younas says.

One of them is Anwar Mohid, 35, who converted to Islam in December and started looking for a partner on Muzmatch. Two days after becoming Muslim, he matched with a woman in Australia.

They talked on the phone for hours a day. A month and a half later, she flew to the US and they got engaged. Mohid says he was slightly nervous about meeting up in person.

They knew they could easily talk on the phone for hours, but weren't sure if they'd click in real life. Eshq, the app that lets women make the first move, is hoping to shake up the Muslim online dating game. Mariam Bahawdory, its founder, says women she spoke with complained about men not knowing how to initiate a conversation.

Some were even harassed for being on the apps in the first place, likely by people who thought it was inappropriate for women to be putting themselves out there. So Bahawdory decided to put the power in womens' hands. While platforms like Muzmatch and Minder have the underlying goal of marriage, Bahawdory says you won't see the word "matrimony" anywhere on Eshq.

Users can choose whether they want to use the app for marriage, dating or friendship. She's aware of the criticism this will likely draw from more conservative crowds, but says she isn't phased. We're bringing the community together to use the platform as they see fit. It's true. Minder and Muzmatch connected me with more people than I could ever encounter in the real world. It opened up my options and allowed me to make my own choices about who to talk to. It was empowering.

A few weeks after downloading the apps, though, I went into settings and made my accounts undiscoverable.

Six single Muslims share their search for love

Modern dating can be a challenge for anyone. But for young Muslims it can be more of a trial, particularly for girls. Even the culture of arranged marriages has begun to change in countries such as the UK. Mutual consent has always been expected in the dominant schools of Islamic law, but increasingly young Muslims in countries such as the UK and America are looking to find a potential partner before involving their families to arrange their marriages.

But not all communities date. Muslims, for example, often get to know potential suitors with the aim of getting married as soon as possible, predominantly to avoid premarital sex.

Through the stories and experiences shared in Real Relationships, we aim to paint a more realistic picture of love in the world today. The views, thoughts, and opinions expressed in this article belong solely to the author and are not necessarily based on research conducted by The Gottman Institute. Submit your Real Relationship story here. My boyfriend and I are in a secret relationship, and that is the only way our relationship could possibly function. I consider myself a fairly honest person, but when it comes to my family and my traditional Muslim community, I lead a double life.

Beyond Tinder: How Muslim millennials are looking for love

Muslim women face challenges to find that perfect spouse who meets their needs emotionally, spiritually and physically, while also finding meaning and purpose in their own lives. The obstacles can seem to be mounting for Muslimahs who are met with double standards on everything from looks, to financial security, to religiosity compared to men. Across the board, women in their 20's are always asked why they are not married yet let's not even talk about what unmarried women in their 30's and beyond hear! She said she struggled with societal norms while seeing her friends marry in their late 20s, but then later saw some struggle with divorce. Men, on the other hand, are often encouraged to seek an attractive spouse. Choose the religious woman lest your hand is stuck to dust because of destitution. Cultural Baggage: Qualified suitors are often overlooked or dismissed when parents and society focus on cultural compatibility rather than personal compatibility. Salika Chowdhury from Michigan said although she was open to marrying outside of her culture, her family wanted her to marry within their Bangladeshi culture. She said this worked out for her in the long run. One woman said she met five or six suitors, while her husband met 40 women before choosing her.

What kind of woman is willing to share her husband?

Some call it haram -- or forbidden -- but more Muslims than ever are turning to apps like Minder and Muzmatch to find romance. When my friend first told me she was looking for a partner on Minder, I thought it was a typo. She didn't. Minder is a real thing, an app Muslims use to browse local singles, much like Tinder.

Jump to navigation. For many modern single Muslims the answer lies online, with dating sites like EliteSingles.

We've been together for 3 years, and another 4 years in long distance relationship since I from another country. After a year of our marriage, he got married to a Muslim woman in Pakistan without my consent. He said it was his parents wish, part of the tradition and culture, and that he has no choice.

How I Found My ‘Mr Right’

Rusul woke to find herself alone. Her new husband had gone. The marriage had lasted just three hours. It wasn't the teenager's first marriage.

Account Options Sign in. Top charts. New releases. Add to Wishlist. With complete photo privacy and an anonymous nickname, you control who can see you. For extra peace of mind, we are the only single Muslim app that allows you to include a Wali or Chaperone in your chats.

The Original

Toggle navigation. Single Muslim - finding a Muslim wife or Muslim husband. It is a common issue around the world. Adding faith into the equation can make this more of a challenge. Find Your Muslim Partner are here to help you find a Muslim marriage partner who is perfectly suited to you. When your religion is important to you, finding the perfect partner, in the right way, is critical. Sounds simple, right? Regardless of what prayers you are currently giving, we mean make a genuine connection about marriage.

Apr 10, - Some call it haram -- or forbidden -- but more Muslims than ever are turning to apps like Minder and Muzmatch to find romance.

Short Answer: There are five important tips you should follow. But first of all, you need to eliminate any type of thinking or acting that would jeopardize your honor, respect, and dignity. Primarily, women in Islam are highly valued, honored, dignified and protected.

7 etiquettes of seeking a spouse

And more importantly how do you reach that realisation? Spouse hunting can seem very much like a job interview. Deen, ambitions, culture, living arrangements, child-rearing philosophies, pet peeves, interests and whether they are a productive individua l, or a lazy so and so who expect you to wait on them, are all put into question.

Muslim men explain why it’s difficult to find a partner to marry

Jump to navigation. Mohammad are just one of the many places Muslims in North America often meet potential spouses either to make a final decision or to initiate the marriage communication process. Other places include fundraising dinners, regional seminars, lectures, at the home of a relative or friend, and the local mosque.

Jump to navigation. For many divorced, widowed or older women, could polygamy be a practical answer to their problems?

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I’m a Conservative Muslim in a Secret Relationship

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